The Story So Far

I suppose that before I get into the soul and substance of this blog--the lives of others--I should probably talk a little bit about myself, where I've been, and what I'm doing now.

While I was born into an Italian Catholic family and attended CCD (Sunday School) for eight years, we never went to church. Sometimes, Catholicism can be a simply cultural part of one's heritage where the religious side is almost completely absent, similar to non-religious Jews. Since it was made clear to me that I was being raised in the faith to continue tradition and make the family happy, I didn't really care about what I was taught, especially when it came to the more difficult elements. By the time I got into middle school, I learned to tune out and gossip with my friends instead of paying attention. A few times, I was almost even kicked out of the class for being noisy or contrary--I was always that smartass kid that had to rebuttal everything. (I think that same stubbornness is what keeps me going today when I face opposition; I was once in the same place and defended the same anti-Catholic arguments).

Nevertheless, I was too close to "the end of the road" to stop catechism, so at 13, I received my Confirmation, became an adult in the eyes of the Church, and didn't show up again for another 4 1/2 years. During that period, high school started, and I eventually got into the New Age movement. When the initial "I'm being spooky and rebellious" streak wore off, I discovered that the Pagan umbrella of faiths were very peaceful, beautiful, and offered me the spiritual independence I was looking for.

I called myself Pagan off and on for the next two years, but deep down, it felt empty and showy. Odder yet was the actual power my friends and I experienced, something very real and tangible that was downright unnerving at points. One night, two of us got simultaneously sick in the middle of a "ritual" as they call it, and as I laid dizzy and nauseated in cold sweat on my best friend's floor, I knew that this was no longer fun and games. Coincidence or not, it scared me enough to convince me to walk away.

Almost a year later, I stumbled onto a Christian website for former Pagans, and I once again began railing against everything I found wrong with the religion. That year was hard on me, though, and I often struggled with feelings of loneliness, apathy, and depression. By New Year's Day of 2006, I knew I needed a centering point, something to be guided by, in my life. I had never stopped believing in God, and in the early hours of that morning I reluctantly reconciled with Him and began the rocky journey as a non-denominational Christian.

That, too, was lacking for a variety of reasons, and despite my hatred of it, I was continually pulled closer to Catholicism. Many of my new Protestant friends insisted this was a bad idea, but I could no longer just push my feelings aside. It took me over a year and a half of research and prayer, but to my horror, I realized that I could no longer refute the truth I never let myself see in the Catholic Church. Just after Easter in 2007, I went and made the first honest confession of my sins (I used to lie to their faces as a kid, then brag about it afterward) to a priest who was challenging but very good to me, and rather than finding condemnation and shame, I found real mercy.

Since then, I've been making up for lost time. That's only the abbreviated version, and I'm going to make it a point to discuss some hairy topics in the future, like Confession and what is (in my humble observation) lacking from other Christian denominations.

Let me make it very clear here that I'm not out to offend anyone. I have many "brothers and sisters" that are Protestant who have encouraged and challenged me throughout the years, and I love them wholeheartedly for their passion. I'm also not directly trying to win converts to Catholicism, but I would like to invite those of you who are curious or no longer Catholic to keep an open mind and an open heart while you read. Again, do comment here with anything you're interested in or confused about. Part of the new age of journalism is the aspect of community, so "come, let us reason together."

This week, we start the real fun. I'm ready; are you?